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The Bookkeeper

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The Bookkeeper

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Chapter Ten

Wednesday Addams & Lurch

The armored corpse ran through the countless infected marines that hadn’t been put down, only to stumble here and there over the unconscious ones.

“Don’t waste your time trying to shoot it,” Una said. “The tranquilizer rounds aren’t that effective against it.”

“Say no more, my smelly sister,” Zaras said as she loaded a thick cylinder into her underbarrel grenade launcher. “I’ve been itching to blow something up all day.”

“Well you’re gonna have to wait,” Kaida said. “If you ruin our chances of getting paid, I’m putting a bullet in the back of your head.”

Zaras gave Kaida a glance before focusing on the armored corpse getting closer towards the gates that now had a stack of three hundred bodies with many more spilling from the tunnels.

“Shouldn’t you be hiding somewhere like a pussy?” Zaras asked as she took aim at the headless corpse. It ran up the small ramp of bodies and launched itself into the air in Una’s direction. Before it reached Una, it collided with Zaras’s grenade. The explosion stopped its momentum, causing it to drop to the ground at the base of Una’s tree. “Did you just flinch, Una?” She asked while firing another explosive at the armored corpse. When the smoke settled its limbs were gone, leaving nothing more than a chard-armored torso.

“Nope,” Sib chimed. “The explosion made her body move.”

“My sweet helpfully unhelpful little brother, Una’s a big girl. She can speak for herself.”

Una ignored her sister’s bait into a useless argument as she relaxed her thighs from around the branch she was perched on and stood up.

“We’re pretty much in the clear for now,” Una began. “So we should probably restock on ammo while we have the chance.”

A feral purr filled the coms, causing Una and Kaida to check their surroundings before realizing it was coming from Zaras. A sound her species made when they were aroused.  

“I think I see him,” Zaras said.

They looked toward the entrance seeing a large figure that towered over the other infected sisters that also shambled from the tunnel. Kaida pulled out her sniper rifle to get a better look.

“A mini giant? He looks as if he’s going to a social event… or a wedding,” Kaida said.

“So not only does he have a big dick but is also ready to get married,” Zaras said.

“He probably smells like a rotting corpse.”

“And he likes it nasty? Sign me up!” Zaras said as she began to drool. With a thumb flick, Zaras popped the lid on her pouch but what she pulled out wasn’t a grenade or another ammo mag, but a round, lightly salted cracker. Placing it in her mouth, she launched herself off her branch and straight into the camp with a thump. “I’m just gonna give your limbs a snip.” Zaras slid her katana free, hesitating to cut the infected when she realized they weren’t even attempting to come after her.

“Leave it, you STUPID FUCKING ANIMAL!” Kaida yelled.

“Why don’t you just shoot it?” Sib asked innocently, his spider body perched on the top of Kaida’s sniper.

“I’ve been asking myself that for the few hours I’ve known these two.”

“No! I’m talking about that big zombie,”

“Oh, well that’s because I wanna see Zaras get herself killed,” she said as a matter of fact. “If I’m lucky, I’ll get to hear her suffer.”

“They’re only going after me,” Una said. “Kaida, help keep them off me.”

“Fuck you. Just because I’d benefit doesn’t mean it’s worth helping an Orc.”

“… I’ll give you Sergeant 16409’s revolver.” 

“Deal,” Kaida said without a second thought. 

She dropped down onto the roof of a log cabin and began single-tapping one infected sister after another with her pistol. Una removed as much ammunition and grenades as she could.

“Zaras, don’t play with it. Just kill it,” Una said.

“If I capture him and make him my property, I’ll be able to breed my own kingdom on the Star Seeker,” Zaras said 

She bathed her blade in the sun’s rays as he held it firmly in her right hand, the tip of the blade almost touching the matted grass on the ground. She began rotating her blade, focusing the reflection of the sun on the creature’s face. The creature groaned as his right hand came up to shield his eyes from the light. Taking this chance, Zaras closed the gap, going straight from his right shin, attempting to get him off his feet. Her moment was stopped as her blade got stuck, wedged in his bone. Before she could react, his massive hand palmed the top of her hand and lifted her off her feet. With how tight she was gripping her katana, it felt like he was gonna pluck her head right off her shoulders. Given her training, it was taboo to let go of your blade, so she held on, screaming through the pain until finally, her blade came free. She flicked her wrist to try and line up her blade, but the creature’s free hand took hold of her arm. He flexed his muscles attempting to rip her apart. Using his firm grip, she used every bit of leverage she had to swing her right boot up and kick him in the jaw, not even letting up for a moment as she began stomping his chin. This staggered him, allowing Zaras to get her head free, however, this also enraged the creature as he took a few steps and with a twist, chucked Zaras straight into the sky and out of the camp. Kaida and Una watched her fly overhead clear across the massive trees. The creature that threw her took a deep breath before starting to roar loud enough that the two could feel it in their chest. Kaida wanted to hear Zaras’s bunch crunching fall back to the ground over the coms but was smart enough to know now was the best time to put down the monster. She took aim with her sniper and fired two rounds, smacking him twice between the eyes. His head rocked back for a moment before he began walking in their direction.

“Bullshit,” Kaida said.

Rumbling came from the ground, almost seeming like the creature’s very steps were causing it, but as it grew stronger a horrible screeching filled the air.

“Run run run RUN RUN RUN!” 

Sib repeated frantically to the point Una and Kaida couldn’t even get a word in. Una stuffed everything she could in her backpack while staring past the infected Orc-kin and Nuns, past the tall creature that tanked two sniper rounds to the forehead, and towards the tunnel where the screeching was coming from. Hordes of human corpses clawed their way out of the cave and engulfed the large man. Kaida leapt off the cabin and landed on Una’s back. For a moment Una thought the nun was trying to kill the girl she had bundled up on her back but remembered that the nuns didn’t run very fast. It was one of the reasons why they traveled as light as possible and thanks to Sib, Una was the nun’s best chance at getting away.

“Go!” Kaida yelled, adding to Sib’s constant demands to run.

Now holding two bodies on her back, Una took two steps toward the wall and leapt. This time she didn’t come crashing back down to the ground. The moment her boots touched down, she took off into a dead sprint.

“Zaras,” Una began. “If you’re still alive, fire your gun or we’re leaving you!”

The coms filled with the sound of Zaras coughing up blood as she tried to speak, “I ca…”

“Sib, doesn’t she have a distress beacon or something?” 

“She never picked it back up! She should be right in front of us.”

A drop of blood smacked into her goggles causing her to come to a sliding stop.

“What the hell are you doing?!” Kaida asked while looking back.

The horde of bodies had already closed the distance of the camp and broke through the entrance with ease. Una frantically scanned the trees, doing her best not to look at the approaching danger until she spotted her sister draped backward across a cracked branch. Pulling out the sergeant’s revolver with her right hand, Una lined up her shot and pulled the trigger. It whizzed past the branch before she took another shot and missed.

“You blind bitch, give it here,” 

Kaida snatched the revolver and pulled the trigger twice, splinting the cracked branch even more. Zaras and the branch fell but Una plucked her sister from the air and took off running right as the horde was close enough to take a swipe at her. Kaida swore as she fired the revolver into the horde. It was strong enough to stop a few dead in their tracks but for everyone she shot down, two more took its place. Una ran, now carrying three, and the thought that she could run faster if she just dropped her sisters. Maybe even with a moment to spare to shoot them both in the head, so they didn’t have to suffer of course.

“The minefield!” Una yelled as the bloated chaton corpses could be seen waddling in her direction. They were way more packed together than before. Noticing her slight hesitation, Sib said.

“Just run past! There’s no one manning the artillery this time.”

She gritted her teeth but at the last second, leapt up and over the wall of bloated Chaton heads. It wasn’t the softest landing for Zaras but at least she wasn’t gonna be breathing in spore clouds. 

“What the hell?!” Kaida asked.

“Shut up!” Una yelled.

Electrical explosions began shaking the ground behind them as the horde ran into the wall of Chaton. Una glanced at the live feed Sib was giving her, seeing the ever-expanding horde getting blown up when they collided with the wall of deformed Chaton.

“What in the heck was that?!” Sib asked, stunned by the explosions.

“Looks like a fucking retarted almost got us killed!” Kaida yelled.

“But that doesn’t make any sense! Those cannons don’t have an auto fire or at least they shouldn’t!”

“It slowed them down a few inches at least,” Kaida said.

“I see the drop pods,” Una said as they entered the forest of trees and empty drop pods. “Think we have enough time to,”

“No!” Sib interrupted. “Just run towards the cliff!”

“You better not!” Kaida yelled. “It’ll tear my arms off trying to hang onto you.” 

“Good idea,” Una began. “You stay here and distract them! Read them your stupid book!”

“… Blasphemy!”

Speeding through the forest of pods and trees, the rocky cliff side came into view. What she didn’t expect to see was a dropship, hovering just over the cliff with its ramp barely touching the cliff’s edge. It was big enough to carry a squad of eleven. It belonged to the Owl species, making Una wonder why it was even there to save them. 

“An Owl?!” Una shouted. “The Star Seeker’s okay then?”

“Unknown!” Sib chimbed. “I’m still unable to connect.”

“This is Owl One,” The intercom rang with the pilot’s voice.  With how she spoke, it sounded as if she just woke up or was just really lazy. “I’m not sure how you’re moving so fast but slow down. If you scratch my dropship, I’ll peck your eyes out. And why does it look like the three of you’re clinging to one another? That’s kind of really gay.”

“You lazy owl bitch!” Kaida shouted. “Do you not see the undead behind us?”

“Mmm, I do… still… if you scratch my ship, I’m scratching your asses. Now hurry up already, I wanna go back to sleep,” she whined.

Una got closer to the dropship, seeing that the ramp was down and waiting. However the closer she got, the easier she noticed that there was no one inside to provide fire support. The fact an Owl dropship was even down here was surely the Captain’s doing as the Owl species didn’t like helping anyone outside their kingdom, let alone being awake at this time.

“We’re in!” Una yelled as she dropped Zaras on the floor before spinning around to direct her gun at the oncoming horde. Before she could even get a few shots in they were gone, replaced by a familiar sight of rocky cliffside speeding past. Una’s stomach began to turn as the feeling of falling washed over her, and yet her feet were firmly locked on the metal floor of the dropship. Thanks to Sib, she was able to see Kaida and Zaras begin to float up behind her. Surprisingly Kaida seemed more focused on trying to inject her injured sister with an All Purpose Syringe instead of strapping herself in and letting Zaras die. The drop ship began to vibrate and purr in such a low rumble. It was as if it was coming from a demonic giant. This wasn’t the rumbling of the drop ship’s propulsion system but of its rotary cannons. What was troubling wasn’t the need to use it, nor even the jealousy felt for the pilot who got to fire it. It was the fact the cannon was firing longer than it needed to. Thanks to overheating, the rotary cannon on top was only supposed to fire in short bursts, and with the dropship being so fast it should have been able to avoid the horde that was chasing them. The pilot allowed the ship to free fall before banking to the left, skirting the edge of the cliff, and skimming over the massive trees. Kaida strapped her sister to the floor before climbing into a seat and strapping herself in.

“Don’t just stand there, sit down!” Kaida barked.

The last thing Una was gonna do was sit down, either in spite or because she was shocked by what she was looking at. The ramp was still open, no doubt the pilot wanted them to fall out but with it open, the three of them could see a wave of rotting corpses spilling off the edge of the cliff. By the looks of the wave, the horde wasn’t anywhere close to the ship and yet the guns still buzzed followed by a sudden shift down as something landed on top with a concerning thump.

“Shit, what are you a mini giant?” The pilot said, seeming oddly relaxed, Una thought.

“No way,” Kaida said as her eyes darted up at the ceiling.

The sound of twisting metal could be heard as an emergency hatch was ripped off and in dropped the large man from before, shaking the drop ship once again.

“Oh no, oh no, this isn’t good,” Sib began to panic. “He can’t be here, that’s a violation! Captain Adam will get in trouble!” 

Una did recall something about never allowing the enemy to step foot inside but the thought was dropped in the “that shit doesn’t matter right now” basket of her brain. She snapped her rifle in his direction and pulled the trigger. Bullets pelted his chest, ripping holes in his tuxedo while his massive form casually strode over towards Una. He groaned in annoyance as he reached out with his left hand and crushed Una’s rifle between his fingers. Yanking it from her grip and snapping it from her shoulder strap, Una balled her right fist before slamming her gloved knuckles into his ribs. Thanks to Sib, she hit hard enough to break bone but sadly not hard enough to break him. The hulking man groaned once again before balling up his own fist and taking a swing at her head. Una ducked only to be blindsided by a strike to her chin with his knee. Her body wanted to go limp and stumble however she refused. Thanks to her clothing having a mind of its own, she was able to prevent being staggered. What should be happening is the ship going vertical to try and make him fall out but given the nature of the marines and their dislike of one another, the pilot kept it leveled hoping that they’d all kill each other. Stepping to the side, Una crashed her left fist into his liver, or at least tried to, thanks to his size. She might have been able to get some of it thanks to him flinching to the side. With a side step and a backhand, the hulking figure snapped Una’s neck, crumpling her to the floor. The man reached down to grab the bundle on Una’s back until he noticed a familiar face stepping in front of him.

“Suck on this,” Zaras said. 

She slammed her under-barrel grenade launcher into his mouth and pulled the trigger. An explosion went off in the man’s stomach but he simply burped up smoke. His hand lanced out to try and grab her but stopped when the nun came over to stuff the barrel of her sniper rifle to the bundle on Una’s back. When he slowly pulled away, Kaida didn’t even smirk in amusement of being right. 

“I knew we should’ve killed this fucking piece of shit has been nothing but trouble, that goes for whatever she’s been carrying around all this time,” Kaida said.

“Quick, make him take off his pants,” Zaras said.

“Owl One,” Kaida began. “Everything’s currently under control. Take us into orbit.”

“Trust me, I wish I could,” the tired-sounding pilot began as she finally closed the ramp, though for a moment she perked up at the suggestion. When the ramp finally sealed, the sound of rushing air damped. “More so because there’s a big hole in my dropship so watching you suffer in the vacuum would be a dream come true. But the Captain asked me personally to help rescue you while the Star Seeker is being scanned for sabotage. Hopefully, the Captain plucks Alais for this.” 

“Fucks Alais?” Zaras chimed.

“As much as I’d love that FILTHY FUCKING TURD BITCH to get removed, it was the Captain who allowed it.” Kaida hadn’t taken her eyes off the man frozen in a squat a few inches away. “As for you, be a good boy and don’t move.”

“Don’t tell my pet what to do,” Zaras said, pointing her blade at the nun.

“Pet?! Whatever this thing is doesn’t belong to you. In fact I plan to offer it to my Queen,” Kaida said.

“He doesn’t belong to either of you,” Sib chimed as his spider body tapped around on the bundle, seeming to be looking for something underneath. “He clearly has some kind of connection to this girl so the smart thing now is diplomacy.”

“Diplomacy is for the week, my naive little brother,” Zaras said.

“It’s much better to kill the opposition than talk to it,” Kaida added.

“Most importantly, in our culture, males don’t deserve the right to speak,” Zaras added.

“… I recall a boy named Prince Adam using diplomacy and now he’s the Prince of Queens,” Sib said.

“Oww, Prince of Queens is definitely a vibe,” Zaras said while rubbing her chin.

“A cute title I must admit,” Kaida said, still keeping her eyes locked on the man.

“… I feel like you two aren’t even listening to me,” Sib whined. “Fine, be that way.” He began dancing his legs around the old fabric until he managed to slice through, revealing the girl’s face. Faced framed by black ponytails, she wore a soft yet belittling gaze that dared rival that of a cold-blooded Queen. The moment the spider cut and removed her gag she asked,

“Prince Adam… of the Hall family?”


Before The Orc-kin’s Arrival

“The Ork-kin are stronger and faster than you,” said Alais, the Orc Queen. In a wide-open field on a perfect sunny day standing in perfectly leveled grass stood Alais and her daughter Una. Due to laws, regulations, and questionable experiments, the Orc Queen was forced to age backward before being allowed to step foot on the Star Seeker. So Una shared her mother’s height, her hair but specifically her youthfulness. With that being said, there were many things Una wasn’t born with, and with every crushing blow, Una took from her mother’s fists was a reminder of that fact. For every strike Una managed to get in, the young Ork was rewarded with five more. Alais took hold of Una’s throat and lifted her with her right hand. Slowly strangling her, Alais went on to say, “But you have something they don’t. The problem is you’re mentally weak.” She released her grip, letting Una drop to the floor, gasping for air. The Orc Queen stared down her nose at Una, watching the young Orc release she was at risk of being kicked in the face. So she launched herself off to the left. Taking a knee with her right hand on the wall, Una tried to catch her breath.

“That’s… shit!” Una said before going into a coughing fit.

The Orc Queen stared down her nose at her battered and bruised daughter.

“… Kimi, the Queen of Chaton was locked away for many years until your father rescued her. She had gone mad however thanks to your father she was cured of her insanity.”

“Because she was weak!” Una said as she bared her fangs.

“Given time, I might have suffered the same outcome… if not for your father’s unwelcomed attention.” The Orc Queen glanced off to the side and thought for a moment. “You can become as strong as you like, fight all the wars the…” she paused, almost forgetting that her life had taken a major change the moment she realized her world was nothing more than a speck in a sea of darkness. “Universe… has to offer but at the end of the day, loneliness is your enemy. Warning…” The Orc Queen said, before smashing her right fist into her daughter’s face. Una was sent flying into a backflip, fainting before each touching the ground. “Your father asked that I give you a warning. Then again, you should always have your guard up.”

“And that’s the first-ever moonwalk done by a spider,” Sib said proudly.

“Impressive, you’re a spider with the soul of a little boy who is the little brother of countless sisters?”

Una’s world was shrouded in darkness. That blissful moment when you’re having the best sleep of your life and slightly awake to be aware of it. Sadly it was spoiled by Sib’s talking. She didn’t recognize the one he was speaking with. Though she sounded oddly amused by Sib’s childishness. The orc’s eyes slowly opened to see Sib’s spider body playfully doing squats on her breastplate. 

“Umm… yes? It’s not really a soul but more like…”

“An… artificial brain? Not bound by a body of flesh and blood but to anything that holds electricity? Which in theory could be a person’s body if given enough artificial enchantments, no… enhancements.”

“Yes! You know it took the Commanders of the ship a very long time to understand that? Granted, in your world, they did just figure out gunpowder, so can’t blame them too much.”

“I admit it’s a lot to take in. Though I’m very much excited to see what’s become of Prince Adam.”

“And who the fuck are you supposed to be?” Una said

She slowly pushed herself up from the floor. Sib’s spider body snapped around, in slight shock that she was awake before crawling up her chest and clinging to the side of her face, helmet, and goggles. She glanced around to see they were still in the drop ship and the hulking man from before now sitting on the floor with his knees up. In front of him sat the young girl Una had captured. To the side, her sisters were sitting together, Kaida reading her bible and whispering its gospel to a fifty caliber round while Zaras sat back, seeming to be relaxing. Given Zaras’s feline-like nature of the Chaton species, Una was well aware of her sister’s impulsiveness when it came to sexual desires. So the fact she wasn’t attacking the man was perplexing.

“I’m Mercredi Madda, an old friend of your father,”

“His lover?!” Zaras blurted out.

Kaida didn’t say anything but the fact she stopped what she was doing made it clear she wanted to know as well. Mercredi seemed to give the question some thought, glancing off to the side for a moment.

“No, just close friends.”

“Bullshit,” Zaras began. “Alais is his best friend and,”

Una seemed to tune out the conversation as she noticed the drop ship wasn’t humming anymore.

“Wait, where are we?” Una asked.

“Quarantine!” Sib chimed as he crawled onto her goggles to look her straight in the face. “Protocol mandates extreme caution when dealing with zombie stuff. Right now we’re in the vacuum of space where no one will hear you scream, AHHH! Did you hear that?”

“Yes,” Una said patiently.

“No you didn’t. Anyway… the drop ship is being scanned, scrubbed, and tested by the Star Seeker.” Una raised her goggles and slipped down her bandana as she took a glance at the emergency hatch. It had been patched with hardening foam and metal sheeting. Now standing on her helmet, Sib went on to say, “It shouldn’t be much longer as the Captain wants Sergeant 16409’s head as soon as possible.” Una noticed a slight mood change from the girl’s gaze. Glancing at her sister’s Una could see that they noticed it as well. Maybe not Zaras as she wore shades and seemed to have sex on the brains. “That reminds me,” Sib began. “His kind isn’t allowed to step foot on the Star Seeker, let alone this drop ship. It’s a criminal offense.”

“Please explain,” Mercredi said.

“He’s too big,” Kaida began. “The Star Seeker has a specific height limit. Even the giant.”

“Tell that to the damn arachnids,” Zaras said.

“It’s much more than that, okay?!” Sib began. “Being that you seem to know Captain Adam, you’ll most likely get nothing more than mean looks but the Captain will be reprimanded. Luckily for you, I know a fix.” Sib tapped Una’s head for her attention. “Give him an APS. It’s an all-purpose syringe with countless tiny umm… robots inside. It’s mainly used to cure damaged parts of the body pretty quickly but it will also make him young again.”

Una leaned and fished out an all-purpose syringe.

“I’ve yet to agree to this… fix,” Mercredi began. “Embardée is my family.” 

“Don’t worry it’s safe after all Alais the Orc Queen used it. Granted her version of the de-aging process was experimental but everything turned out fine. He will still be as strong as he is now, just younger and smaller.”

“Thank you for trying to help, Sib. But we’re not obligated to trust such a thing for someone we don’t know anymore.”

“Nor would I expect you to,” 

A muffled voice came from the other side of the drop ship’s hatch. A voice that caused all three operatives to spring to their feet, standing at attention. The drop ship’s hatch slowly began to open, lowering down to reveal three commanding officers, Alais the Orc Queen, Kimi the Chatan Queen, and Lucy the Queen of hell. Standing in front of them wearing a warm smile was Captain Adam of the Star Seeker.

“He’s in pain,” Kaida whispered as bloody tears rolled over her cheeks.

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Don't Cross The Bridge

A baby-faced little boy who's tougher than he looks with a smart mouth, and a pretty little girl with a mean right hook and a foul mouth.

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